421. Martamaria Kupeczik – The Lessons of Toxic Love and Signs of Psychopathy and Narcissism in Potential Partners

Marta Maria (Martamaria) Kupeczik was born in the People’s Republic of Hungary on 15 March, a day which commemorates the Hungarian Revolution of 1848. By 1985, while she was attending elementary school, there was already political and economic instability, and János Kádár, Hungary’s last communist leader, was forced to recognize theimpending collapse of communism in his country. However, thanks to the Revolutions of 1989, communist rule peacefully transitioned to a democratic system and Martamaria’s generation was the first young generation who could travel freely to visit other Western European countries.

Martamaria studied German in Rostock/Germany in 1993 and progressed from zero to intermediate level in just three months. Speaking a major Western European language created a stepping stone for her to travel within Germany, where she broke the Guinness vocal range world record in 1998 at the Hochschule für Musik Carl Maria von Weber. She then travelled to London for the official recognition of the record which she received in 1999. She returned to Hungary in 2000 when her UK visa expired. She enjoyed some media attention on her return to her home country but she was not being able to connect to the popular international music scene of the time and returned to the UK at the first opportunity–once Hungary joined the EU in 2004. Martamaria applied for Tech Music Schools, where she graduated as a Bachelor of Music popular performance singer in 2009. During her study years she co-founded the rock band Achilla, where she was active at all levels, from the organization of the band to the music creation. Being the lyricist of the band she unintentionally reflected on the Narcissistic Abuse Syndrome (NAS) she – at this time unknowingly- suffered from while touring with the band. She was under coercive control during her study and musical touring years.

As she was always helping people improve their life in some way, Martamaria has decided to become a life coach. She successfully completed the Coach Training International (CTI) prestigious coach training program in 2015. She recognized her ongoing trauma bond to her controller only in October 2016 while attending a dangerous personalities seminar where she learned that she was personally and professionally relying on a highly pathological covert narcissist and this was also the major cause of her band’s “mysterious” disintegration.

Mainly because of this experience Martamaria started to research serious empathy deficits which lead her to the recognition that, due to the impaired ability to mutually connect, significant affective empathy deficit leads its sufferers to resort to coercively controlling, evoking Stockholm Syndrome in their victims. When recognizing NAS as part of an international major mental health pandemic, she decided to devote her life to mental health research and public speaking https://martamaria.com/

Martamaria has co-authored a book revealing her own trauma bonding story that was published on 11 Nov 2021 in the SHIFT – A New Era Begins: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Shift-Begins-Mrs-Sabine-Matharu/dp/1916029728/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1636564323&sr=8-1

Chapter 18 – “The Lesson of Toxic Love” became a postgraduate teaching material at the St Mary’s University, Twickenham “Human Trafficking, Migration and Organised Crime” MA’s identification, care and support for victims module that she herself studied there.

The following are Martamaria’s

– new LinkedIn profile: https://www.linkedin.com/in/martamaria-k/

– podcast guest profile: https://www.matchmaker.fm/podcast-guest/martamaria-kupeczik-433978

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